The Many Men I Married

In 12 years I’ve been married to three men – sort of.

I mean technically, he’s the same man, but career-wise it is three very different men. I would never have guessed 18 years ago when I met this tall, fast-talking, geology/paleontology studying man child that he would someday be a police officer, but only after a stint as a lawyer. In fairness, I guarantee he didn’t predict that either.

the men I marriedCopyright: konradbak / 123RF Stock Photo

Would I still want to marry him knowing what he would become?


I surely didn’t date and marry him because of his career choice. However his career choice has influenced our marriage and family life.

Thirty-seven years old.

Today marks the birthday of my favorite man.

It’s hard to believe I’ve known him for nearly 18 of those years.  I still remember the very first time I saw him. He was slowly pedaling away on an old, rickety stationary bike in the activity room of my freshman year residence hall. He, a community advisor, had brought his floor of residents to my hall for a program that my community advisor had organized. I don’t even remember the program, but I took notice of the tall, older looking guy on the bike.

Who knew he was actually – as he reminds everyone- 53 days younger than me?

He has always looked older than me, something that any woman who is older than her significant other will gladly accept.

So I married my college sweetheart, three men in one?!

The man I married – law student.

law student Brian

So he wasn’t a law student when we got married, he was an aspiring law student – he started law school six weeks after we got married.

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Open Letter to: Night Shift Police Wives

police in uniform saluting

To the other night shift police wives*,

You are not alone.

Somewhere there is another first responder’s wife feeling the same way you are. She wonders just how she’ll make it through – just like you are.

We’re all trying to navigate this crazy life we were given and to support our husbands. All of that while taking care of our families. It’s not always easy.

Sometimes you feel on top of the world like you can handle anything on the home front and the dangers of his job don’t worry you one bit. Sometimes you feel like you’re cracking at the seams and you fear for his safety every hour of his shift.

It’s normal, and you’re not alone.

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A Father’s Day Tribute to My Husband

Brian with the girls bowlingDaDa, Daddy, Dad, Father.

The name may change over time, but the fundamental role remains throughout a child’s life. Hopefully, their dad is someone they can look up to, they can learn from, they can be supported by and who loves them unconditionally.

I had no idea that I could love my husband more than on our wedding day, but I do. In fact, I love him more and differently with each passing year. Since, we have become parents I have found new reasons to love him. Don’t worry it’s not all perfect I’ve also found new reasons to be annoyed and frustrated.

Oh, we’ve had our fair share of parenting arguments over the past eight years, and I’m certain there are A LOT more in our future. I mean we do have ten straights years of parenting teenagers, and girls at that, ahead of us.

In honor of Father’s Day this weekend, I’m taking the opportunity to highlight the important role my husband plays in our daughters’ lives.

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